Two weeks ago while working on the kitchen cabinets out in the garage, I noticed the bag of grass seed I bought awhile back had been chewed open. Of course, I immediately blamed the squirrels – little devils are into everything! Nothing’s sacred anymore! Anyway, last Friday evening, I decided it was time to start the stenciling on the cabinet doors and went out to the garage to grab one to experiment with. As I got out there and picked up the door – I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye and looked up just in time to see a nice, fat rat running for cover.
Actually, those are one of the things I am terrified of. I had one once back in the late 80s while living in Alexandria, VA. The nasty thing got into the trash can and I saw it when I dropped in a bag of old newspapers. Of course, my ex was away at training and I had nobody who could dispose of the vermin for me. So, I grabbed my handy 22-short pocket pistol and shot the thing – a few times. Ok, so I emptied the entire clip into the trash can. Amazingly, there was only one hole in the can when I was done, so it was apparent the rat got the worst of it. I was referred to as "The Great White Hunter" for a while . . . .
Anyway, back to 2004. As soon as I noticed the creature (I’m sure it was about a foot long or more), I got on the phone and alerted my son, Michael. I said, “Michael – I have a rat in my garage and NO GUN!” After poo-pooing my hysteria for a bit, he finally agreed to come over and lead the search party. We moved lots of junk in the garage, and he was armed only with a flashlight and spade. I, all the while, stood cringing in the corner. We finally decided it was a huge job – too big for a spade – and ended up going to the hardware store for heavy artillery – a rat trap. We baited it with a ball of American cheese and left it on a well-traveled route (you could tell due to the poop trail).
Long story short, it finally was killed sometime Saturday night (a good, clean kill – right behind its little ear) but I had to dispose of the corpse. (Michael had made it clear he had NO intention of doing this for me – I was being WAY too silly!) I managed to pick it up, trap and all, with the trusty spade and put it in a plastic bag. It now sits in the trash can, waiting for this morning’s pick up. I can’t wait to know it is finally out of my life! Be grateful I didn't include a picture of this!
Yes, I apologized to the squirrels :(
Actually, those are one of the things I am terrified of. I had one once back in the late 80s while living in Alexandria, VA. The nasty thing got into the trash can and I saw it when I dropped in a bag of old newspapers. Of course, my ex was away at training and I had nobody who could dispose of the vermin for me. So, I grabbed my handy 22-short pocket pistol and shot the thing – a few times. Ok, so I emptied the entire clip into the trash can. Amazingly, there was only one hole in the can when I was done, so it was apparent the rat got the worst of it. I was referred to as "The Great White Hunter" for a while . . . .
Anyway, back to 2004. As soon as I noticed the creature (I’m sure it was about a foot long or more), I got on the phone and alerted my son, Michael. I said, “Michael – I have a rat in my garage and NO GUN!” After poo-pooing my hysteria for a bit, he finally agreed to come over and lead the search party. We moved lots of junk in the garage, and he was armed only with a flashlight and spade. I, all the while, stood cringing in the corner. We finally decided it was a huge job – too big for a spade – and ended up going to the hardware store for heavy artillery – a rat trap. We baited it with a ball of American cheese and left it on a well-traveled route (you could tell due to the poop trail).
Long story short, it finally was killed sometime Saturday night (a good, clean kill – right behind its little ear) but I had to dispose of the corpse. (Michael had made it clear he had NO intention of doing this for me – I was being WAY too silly!) I managed to pick it up, trap and all, with the trusty spade and put it in a plastic bag. It now sits in the trash can, waiting for this morning’s pick up. I can’t wait to know it is finally out of my life! Be grateful I didn't include a picture of this!
Yes, I apologized to the squirrels :(
1 comment:
Oh, my god! Thank you for the laugh on this crappy morning when everyone else is existing just to piss me off. Needless to say, it's been one of those days. UGGHHH.
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